what is most important to you?

Elle's blessing day

When I first saw this question I thought I knew my answer immediately, family. As I thought more about it, however, I realized that the most important part of my life is my faith, my beliefs, my religion. To be fair, though, my religion is centered around families.

Who I am, and my actions are based off of my belief system. I love my parents and my family because I know the importance of families in God's plan for me. I respect my parents because it is commanded of me, and I know it's right. Education is important to me. I love learning, and it is because the more I learn the more I see God's hand in everything.

The theory of evolution makes me laugh. With everything I know about the human body and is complexities I cannot fathom the idea that it happened by a single cell splitting over and over again. The big bang theory is just as hilarious to me. This earth is in the perfect condition for life, and you want me to believe it was out if luck? We have a living Heavenly Father that sent His son to create this world for us. That same son came down to Earth later, as a baby boy, and lived a perfect life so he could become our Savior.

My religion has taught me that I am a daughter of God, and that I should live my life in a way that He would see fit. I should serve and love others. I should respect my spirit and my body enough to reserve myself for the man that will become my husband. I should learn more about my Father in Heaven and my brother, Jesus Christ so I can emulate their attributes and become more like them.

I know, through my religion, that there is life after death. I know that I can be with my family forever of I live a life worthy of that blessing. That is why my religion is the most important to me. I want my family forever, and because of my religion I know how.

life, death, & tender mercies

Let me tell you a little bit about my brother-in-law, Mitch. Mitch was an amazing man. He was so kind, generous, and smart. He was willing to do anything for anyone. He, on multiple occasions, helped fix our computers, babysit at a moment's notice, and made us laugh. He was such a good uncle. He was one of the first to make Ellie laugh. I remember when he was dating Brittany and he wanted to use our garage to build her a sailboat. Who does that? Mitch does that. Mitch always made me feel like a culinary genius. His favorite meal that I made was my homemade Cafe Rio, and he could never get enough of the cilantro lime rice. He kept Brittany in line, yet couldn't get enough of her. He was the best.

On February 25th, I was in St. George visiting family. I had been there all week and Jeremy was supposed to come down the next day after work to spend the weekend with us and drive Ellie and me home on Sunday. Thursday night I called Jeremy before I went to bed to say goodnight. He was having fun with his brother Jake, so our conversation was short because I didn't want to keep him. At midnight my phone woke me up. It was Jeremy. He was at the hospital. He told me that Mitch and Brittany went to the gym earlier that night and when they got home Mitch was having some pain in his lungs. He started pacing while Brittany found him some pain meds. The next thing she knew he called out for her and collapsed. He never woke again. He was 24. Brittany is 25 years old and a widow.

I couldn't sleep that night. I was sick to my stomach and in shock. I felt so alone. Jeremy couldn't come get me because he was with Brittany (as he should be) and I had no way home. I spent most of Friday sobbing or in denial. I finally found a way home at got back around ten o'clock that night. It felt good to be back with Jeremy. I slept much better that night. Brittany was being brave and spent the night at her house with her mom.

Dealing with the loss of a loved one is bizarre. A small part of you knows they are gone, so you constantly have an empty feeling. The rest of you doesn't want to believe it. You keep thinking that he'll be back to talk more nerd talk that is completely over your head. Every day lasts forever. You keep wanting it to end hoping that the next day will be easier. It does get a little easier, but mainly because you get more caught up in your denial.

I am so very blessed to know of God's plan. I know that I'll see Mitch again. I know he and Brittany will be reunited. I know families are forever through priesthood power. I also know that God loves my family and me. I know this through the tender mercies he has shown us.

Tender Mercy #1: Jake & Jeremy got to spend one last time with him.

Earlier that night, Mitch and Brittany came over to help Jeremy get some stuff at Home Depot with their truck. Jake came also, and they were able to spend just a little bit more time with their brother-in-law before he left them.

Tender Mercy #2: I was in St. George.

Although it was hard being away from Jeremy at a time like this, it left him distraction-free to be there for Brittany.

Tender Mercy #3: Mitch was going to BYU.

Since Mitch was attending BYU, he and Brittany lived close. This gave us the opportunity to spend more time with him. It also gave Ellie a chance to know him. Although she won't remember him when she gets older, we have plenty of videos and pictures of him with her to tell her about him when she gets older.

I am so grateful for my knowledge of God's plan. I am grateful for the sealing power of the priesthood. I am grateful for the atonement and for the opportunity we have to live again. Life is short. Sometimes you have no idea how short it can be. I plan to take advantage of every moment I can and spend it with family.